Bola supported her girlfriend through school with the hope of getting married to her someday; he never suspected any foul play from her side. They were cool together until he proposed to her, and got rejected. Her only excuse was that he wasn’t a Christian.
“I met her in my final year, and she was just a fresher. I fell in love with her. She was young and beautiful. Then I was the one in love, and it was obvious she didn’t love me the same way I did. I tried all I could to make her love me and at last she began to reciprocate my love. She was my joy giver and I didn’t withhold any good thing from her. I provided everything she needed in school and even paid her school fees. I studied Computer Engineering and had my own office even while in school. I was doing fine financially and didn’t want her to suffer or follow men because of money. I made sure she never lacked anything. Besides, she was a medical student and in her final year.
“Then I asked her to marry me but she rejected my proposal in front of my friends. I was shocked. I felt she had no reason to reject me after all I did for her. She told me she couldn’t marry me because I was not a Christian. She said her family won’t accept me and it was her decision. On that day I was heartbroken. Someone I trained in school, and all these years we were together, she never mentioned that my religion could be a hindrance. She never complained about my faith. We were both Yoruba but of different religions. She had tried to convince me to join her religion but I refused. Sometimes I did follow her to her church when they had any programme. I didn’t have issues with her religion. I thought our love was enough. The only thing I noticed was that during festive seasons, if I invited her she wouldn’t come. She was always scared of getting pregnant for me. I tried getting her pregnant and it never worked. She told me she preferred getting pregnant after school, and I thought it was reasonable. My elder sister warned me about her. She said the girl was cunny and didn’t love me, but I didn’t listen.
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“She insisted that she couldn’t marry me. She even told me she could only marry a Christian. Now I have asked her to return everything I spent on her but she told me that she didn’t force me to spend on her.”
Dear Bola, I think the signs were there from the beginning but you chose not to see them or probably got blinded by your emotions. As it is, you can’t force her to marry you – a forced union is never good for both parties because it’s going to be from one problem to another. So, why not save yourself from the stress of always begging someone to stay or love you? Leave her with her conscience and move on. I see a kindhearted guy who is capable of love, and don’t let this change you. Let her go. I know it’s painful after all the time, emotions, and money you have invested but sometimes a broken relationship clears the way for real people, who would love you, to enter your life.
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