Culture shock can influence lives, marriage

Elizabeth Badejo

Living in a new country can have a significant impact on lives and a direct influence on decision-making, communication, exposure, and lifestyle in general.

The mass migration of Nigerians to the United Kingdom in the last few years and the culture shock that often follows such a movement cannot be ignored.

Marriage is a partnership, and couples should be prepared to make intentional efforts to serve each other. But when a man strives on traditions alone, he is more likely to feel entitled and demand respect he may not be able to reciprocate.

Unfamiliar environment

Life can become frustrating and traumatic for many couples learning to navigate the changes, especially women who are left to take care of the home with little or no help from their husbands, either due to cultural prejudice from their home country, which is often the overriding factor or their lack of compassion.

Some of the challenges many couples also face cannot be isolated from the impact of being in an unfamiliar environment which lacks the support system that was available to them when they lived in Nigeria.

Recently, the law enforcement agency in the United Kingdom appealed to Nigerian women living in the country to curb the high rate of domestic violence reports to the agency regarding their spouses as some of the issues could be resolved amicably between the couples.

Insensitive attitude

This report has steered up a huge conversation on social media at home and in the diaspora, highlighting the insensitive attitudes of some Nigerian women towards their spouses when they relocate abroad and become influenced by the Western system.

On the other hand, one would think that one of the main purposes of relocating abroad is to integrate and experience life from a distinct perspective.

While women are more likely to adapt to the changes through learned behaviours, men are more likely to stick to inherited traits passed down from their parents and society, which are more difficult to change.

Protective boundary

Adapting to a new life in an unfamiliar environment as a couple can have a massive impact on marriages and couples who take these changes for granted often end up disagreeing on everything and anything.

Even though this report focused on the attitude of Nigerian women in the diaspora, it is fair to say that there is no smoke without fire as there is a reason behind every behaviour.

They say that when you are in Rome, do as the Romans do, unfortunately, if a man is set in his way and not prepared for the changes that will occur, he may certainly face the wrath of his wife and the law that protects her in her new country.

Dignity and respect

The patriarchal culture of Nigerian society places men as the dominant figure in their homes while women are expected to be submissive and only given few rights.

However, the reverse is the case in the Western world where women are seen as the backbone of their society and valued for their contribution to nurturing their families and being able to juggle between motherhood and their career.

Every man and woman deserves love, dignity, and respect and a real man creates a positive environment for his wife where she will strive, feel appreciated and empowered too.